The Invisible Weight That’s Wearing You Out: Mental Load + Overwhelm
- INNERROOM
- Aug 5
- 6 min read
There’s something most of us are carrying—but rarely naming: mental load.
You know what I mean. That never-ending open browser tabs of to-dos, reminders, decisions, and “don’t forgets” running in the background of your mind 24/7.
Pay that bill.
Respond to that text.
Don’t forget your friend's birthday.
You're behind on work.
Do we have anything for dinner?
What am I doing with my life?
Did I pray today? Was it enough?
Should I be doing more?
Even when your body is still, your brain is doing laps. And it’s exhausting.
That’s mental load. And over time, it leads to one thing: overwhelm.
In This Post
What Is Mental Load?
Mental load is the hidden labor of keeping life running. It’s the planning, anticipating, remembering, and decision-making that goes on in your head all day long.
And while it's often talked about in the context of parenting or household responsibilities, the truth is:
Everyone carries some version of it—men and women alike
If you're managing your own schedule, family, career, finances, or calling—you’re carrying a mental load.
You might not call it “overwhelm.” You might just feel tired. Pulled in too many directions. Numb. Responsible for things you can’t fully control.
Whether you're the one who holds it all together at home, the one everyone counts on at work, or the one trying to stay faithful when you're running on empty—this weight is real.
And when it goes unchecked, it can drain your focus, your peace, and even your connection with God.
Step-by-Step Path to Peace
✍️ Grab a journal or a few sheets of paper. Let’s walk this out together.
Step 1: Externalize the Mental Load
Get it out of your head and onto paper.
Your brain was never meant to hold everything at once. That’s what paper (and the Holy Spirit) are for.
Start by dumping out everything you’re carrying:
Tasks at work or school
House projects or errands
Worries and anxieties (relationships, finances, health)
Mental clutter (appointments, birthdays, random thoughts)
Emotional weight (grief, guilt, unresolved conversations)
Don’t organize it yet—just get it all out.
As you write, pray:
“Lord, show me what I’ve been carrying that You never asked me to hold.”
Step 2: Identify the Invisible Pressures
Before we sort anything, pause and ask:
Why am I carrying so much?
A lot of our mental load comes from unspoken expectations we’ve accepted and placed on ourselves:
“I should be doing more.”
“I can’t let anyone down.”
“If I don’t carry it, who will?”
“God/They need me to show up strong.”
These thoughts often grow from fear, pride, comparison, or people-pleasing—not from God's voice.
If we don’t acknowledge those inner scripts, we’ll end up rebuilding a similar list again tomorrow. That’s why this step matters so much.
Take a moment to:
Circle any tasks or worries on your list that feel loaded with guilt or pressure.
Write down any lies you might be believing about what makes you worthy or valuable.
And then ask:
God, what do You say about me? What does success look like in Your Kingdom?
Step 3: Prioritize Peace Over Productivity
Let’s reframe success.
We live in a culture that celebrates hustle, output, and crossing the most off your list. But that’s not how God defines a meaningful life.
If we don’t redefine success, we’ll keep measuring ourselves by a standard that leaves us exhausted, discouraged, and spiritually dry. That’s why this shift is crucial: because your soul wasn’t designed to live in survival mode.
What if your day wasn’t judged by how much you got done—but by how much peace you carried? How present you were with God? With people?
Ask yourself:
“What would bring peace to my soul today—not just progress to my checklist?”
Jesus said:
“Come to Me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” (Matt. 11:28)
This is the lens we now use to sort what you wrote down.
Step 4: Sort What You’re Carrying
Let’s go back to your list. Now, with a clearer heart and a peace-first mindset, begin to sort:
🟢 What’s Yours to Carry (Right Now)
Is this a responsibility God has actually given me?
Is this something timely with a clear next step?
Can I do something about this today or this week?
Highlight these. These are your assignments.
🟡 What’s Not Yours to Fix or Force
Is this something I’m holding out of fear or control?
Is it someone else’s job to decide, solve, or initiate?
Am I being driven by guilt more than God?
Put a star next to these. They may matter to you, but they aren’t yours to solve.
🔵 What Belongs Fully to God
Is this out of my control?
Have I prayed about it more than I’ve worried about it?
Is this something I need to surrender?
Draw a cross beside these. Write them again on a separate page titled: "God, This Is Yours."
Then release them in prayer:
“God, I hand this over to You. Help me trust You here. Remind me I’m not alone in it.”
🧩 Need Help Sorting or Taking the Next Step?
If you find yourself staring at your list and still feeling overwhelmed, stuck, or unsure of what to do next—you're not alone. Sometimes clarity doesn’t come from trying harder. It comes from slowing down and inviting someone to walk with you.
That’s what Christian coaching is for.
Coaching helps you:
Gain clarity on what matters most right now
Discern your next step with confidence and peace
Set healthy rhythms and boundaries that align with God's heart
Stop over-functioning and start moving forward in freedom
If you’re carrying more than you can manage—or if you just need a safe space to process with a trusted guide—we’d love to support you.
Step 5: Renew Your Mind
Clearing the list helps your brain. But renewing your thoughts restores your soul.
Romans 12:2 reminds us:
"Be transformed by the renewing of your mind."
Here are some thought swaps to start practicing:
“I have to do it all.” → "God will help me carry what matters most."
“I’m behind.” → "I’m walking in God’s timing, not the world’s."
“I’m failing.” → "His grace is made perfect in my weakness."
“I can’t rest yet.” → *"Rest is part of obedience, not a reward for finishing."
Let these truths interrupt your thought loops.
But what if they don’t?
What if you read the truth but still feel stuck in the same thoughts, fears, or exhaustion?
That doesn’t make you weak. It makes you human. Sometimes we need help renewing our minds when things are deeply embedded. If the lies are rooted in past experiences, trauma, or unhealed places of the heart, you might need someone to walk you through healing—not just thinking differently.
You don’t have to do that alone. If you’re ready to receive help, consider booking a heart healing session. It’s a safe space to process with Jesus and a trusted guide, so you can experience real freedom, not just new information.
Step 6: Invite God into the Details
This isn’t a one-time journaling exercise. It’s a lifestyle shift.
You don’t need to wait until burnout or breakdown to bring your load to God.
Strong doesn’t mean silent. Inviting God in isn’t weakness—it’s wisdom.
Make it a habit to:
Pause before your day and ask, “God, what matters most today?”
Hand things over as you go. "Lord, I trust You with this conversation, this deadline, this decision."
Incorporate quiet, worship, rest, and breath. These are holy, not optional.
He cares about every detail—and He's not asking you to carry life alone.
Final Thought: Peace Is Possible
You’re not weak. You’re not failing. You’re just carrying more than you were designed to hold alone.
But there’s a path back to peace. And it starts by slowing down, laying it all out, and letting God speak into what is your yoke to carry—and what isn’t.
You don’t have to prove anything to belong.
You just have to come. 💚
